Make
Your Caring Bigger: Stories and
Teachings of Taihaku Priest Roshi
It takes a sangha to write a book about Taihaku Roshi: to begin to portray her compassion, her vibrant energy, her delight in life, her many talents. The list of contributors is lengthy. It has been my privilege, through the long process of working on this book, to come to know and appreciate Taihaku Roshi more deeply.
Rev. Kenzan’s Introduction, reprinted below, gives an overview of Make Your Caring Bigger. Those of you who have not received a copy at the Three-year Memorial Service can pick up a copy at Shao Shan Temple, or may order a copy from Amazon.
--Glenda Bissex, Editor
Editor’s
note: A grateful sangha extends its
heartfelt appreciation to Glenda Bissex for her many hours of service over
several years editing the collection of teachings and stories of Taihaku
Roshi. Bows to Rev. Kenzan for writing
original material and scouring the Shao Shan Temple archives to find photos and
Dharma talks that Taihaku Roshi wrote or spoke. Thanks also to Alan Taplow for the many
hours he donated to creating the layout and formatting the book, to Julie
Hand for her help editing and proofreading, and to Anne Lynn for the final
proofreading of the entire book.
INTRODUCTION
Taihaku-Roshi
did not write any books. Or even any
magazine articles. She gave Dharma Talks
that were delightful and deep, yet words were not her primary way of teaching. Her primary way of teaching was simply by how
she was. How she was as she took care of
her plants in the vegetable garden, how she was as she polyurethaned Temple
window sills, how she was cooking for unexpected visitors, how she was as she
sat together with someone in tears.
Some of the few
writings she did do are included here.
There are a few Dharma Talks that Taihaku-Roshi had written for the Shao
Shan Temple newsletter. And there is a
single recorded Dharma Talk that she gave on short notice at an American Zen
Teacher’s Conference. It is transcribed
here.
Taihaku-Roshi
was invited several times a year to offer an opening Devotional for the Vermont
State Senate. She delighted in the
opportunity to be part of the State legislative in this small, but potentially
significant way. Her father had been a
state senator in Massachusetts and she would often comment on the connection
she felt with him as we’d head toward the gold-domed Capitol Building in
Montpelier. The Senate Devotional is
limited to 3 minutes and Taihaku would craft the wording with great care,
resulting in poem-like compositions. A
few of these are included in this book.
As part of the
painting of the picture of Taihaku-Roshi and her legacy, there are also
photographs and a few additional writings about and for her: a poem for the 49th
Day after her passing, her obituary, and her life story. There is also a map of the Shao Shan Temple
land and an associated “Legend.” Perhaps Shao Shan Temple land is now like her
body. She lives on not just in the
Temple, but also in the laughing trees, grasses and brooks. The Temple has
always extended beyond the building – out under the red pine trees, up the hill
into the cemetery, encompassing the mountain “power points,” the fragrant
beaver wetlands, the trees laden with apples and crabapples and the abundantly
prolific vegetable garden.
In the weeks
following Taihaku-Roshi’s sudden passing, the Shao Shan Temple sangha gathered
weekly to share stories of her teachings and the ways in which she had affected
each of us in life-changing ways. As
sangha members shared stories of how interactions with Taihaku-Roshi affected
them, we all learned new things. We
laughed and cried and Taihaku-Roshi continued to teach us. As she still does. And with this current sharing of stories and
teachings, may Taihaku-Roshi’s way of being also extend now to you, dear
reader, and make all of our caring bigger.
by
Rev. Kenzan Seidenberg
Taihaku Roshi designed the Temple with an exquisite attention to
detail: every inch has been touched -- polyurethaned, painted, cleaned -- cared
for. For more than twenty years, she
filled the space between the temple walls with the energy of her practice. To be here, to be within the temple is to be
within the mind of Taihaku Roshi. And
the surrounding land echoes her presence with the cawing of ravens and the
brilliant flashing of fireflies.
Everywhere on the Shao Shan Temple land is a place of remembrance of
Taihaku Roshi.
And there are also a few places where that is more visibly the
case and where her cremated remains are lovingly honored.
Taihaku Roshi was ever cognizant of life’s impermanence and had
details written out well in advance, including that she wanted to be cremated and
that her cremated remains be buried in the Shao Shan Temple cemetery. In the cemetery, the area to the left of the
ceremonial circle is the designated area for temple priests and abbots. Within this area, she had selected a spot as
near as possible to her mother and marked it with a small quartz rock -- in a
spot in the shade of hemlock, birch, and maple and with a view of the
mountains, as if she watches over the temple and the comings and goings of the
sangha.
The
Japanese calligraphy on the first line (太白) is
her name “Tai-Haku” meaning “Great White” or symbolically, “Great Purity.” On
the second line, 性山, means “Shao Shan” and é–‹å±±)
means “monastery founder” (Literally the two Japanese characters for monastery
founder mean “Opener of the Mountain.”)
The second place where there are a very small amount of Taihaku
Roshi’s cremated remains is in the Temple Small Room (the room on the Buddha’s
right). Here in the Small Room is an
altar dedicated to Taihaku Roshi. Many
of the elements on the Taihaku Altar were there previously. From the beginning,
Taihaku Roshi had an altar there to honor the teachers in her life. The photos on the altar are (from right to
left) Jakuen Zenji (Hokyoji founder), “Dochosan” (Shinkai Yoitsu Daiosho, her
teacher), Taihaku Roshi, Hakusan Roshi (and others including a young Dochosan),
Kirpal Singh (the guru in the Sant Mat tradition, Taihaku Roshi’s early
spiritual practice prior to Soto Zen), and Kirpal Singh together with Nina
(Taihaku Roshi in her 20s lived with Nina at the Wawasiki Ashram). Only the photos of Taihaku Roshi and Dochosan
were added after her passing. Below in
the center is a large group photo of the 2013 Mountain Seat Ceremony
(Shinzanshiki) when Taihaku Roshi formally became abbot in a ceremony attended
by numerous priests from around the country and a large number from Japan.
In addition to the photos, in the center there is a black and gold
Memorial Tablet or “ihei.” This is
traditional on Japanese memorial altars and it is like a small stupa, a kind of
prayer in physical form. Down the front
of the ihei it says “Shao Shan Founder Taihaku Nishiren Daiosho True Rank.” On
the back is her date of passing. In
addition to candles and fresh flowers, on the altar are also small offerings of
food and daily fresh coffee or tea.
Sometimes these are kinds of food that she specifically liked, sometimes
they are a portion of some food donated to the temple. During the gardening season, there is usually
something offered from the garden.
Some sangha members greet Taihaku Roshi at the Taihaku Altar in
the Small Room, some greet her at the Great White rock in the cemetery, some
imbibe her presence in the garden (“The Leafye Garden”) or in the Zendo. All are places of remembrance.
by Rev. Kenzan
Seidenberg
On May 19, Shao Shan Temple conducted a Three-Year
Memorial Service for Taihaku Roshi who passed away unexpectedly on May 24,
2021. Rev. Kenzan and Rev. Ejo McMullen,
Abbot of Buddha Eye Temple, Eugene, Oregon, officiated at the service. Over 40 sangha members and friends of Taihaku
Roshi attended the service either in person or online.
In Japan, it is customary that the third year after someone’s passing is an important memorial. It seems that there is an understanding that someone’s physical departure is not simply complete with an immediate funeral service. Traditionally there can be services after seven days, 49 days, one year, three years, seven years, then 13, 17, 25, 33, and 50 years. Like the inverse of a rundown on the inkin (handbell), the spacing between rings getting increasingly longer. I do not know the history of these numbers, but intuitively it feels like an honoring of the reverberations of a person’s life that continue to echo through time. And we witness the ongoing strength of Taihaku Roshi’s reverberations with the large gathering of temple community, neighbors, and friends that came together after three years to honor her influence
Rather than
providing a narrative describing the Memorial Service, we thought it would be
more meaningful to ask formal students to write about their experiences of
attending the service. Through their
words and memories, a beautiful image of the ceremony has been drawn.
--Chogetsu
--Jikirin
On the day of the three-year memorial, the altar was alive with two vases of fresh flowers paying homage to a now familiar photograph of Taihaku smiling with her shaved head and holding her hossu. Members of the sangha filled the room with gentleness and, like the altar, offered collective warmth for our shared grief. The service, presided over by Ejo McMullan and Kenzan Seidenberg, was brought to life with incense and candles and inhabited with the presence of the sangha chanting in reverence for all Taihaku brought to the world, creating a loving container for our remembering.
--Kukyoku
The most poignant aspect of Taihaku Roshi’s memorial service was the slow, meandering procession up the path to the Temple cemetery to lay flowers at her memorial stone. We were silent, but we were surrounded by the music of songbirds, the cacophony of ravens, and the life-giving energy of spring. Winding back down to the fire, we ended the morning by forming a circle and bowing as a hawk circled lazily above.
-- Antei
Sitting in the side room at Taihaku’s three-year memorial, I had a window view of her white quartz stone marker nestled between the red pines. She was looking into the temple. After her passing, I thought “she left us too soon.” At the memorial, I felt the intensity of how her passing strengthens and transformed the sangha. It powerfully brought us closer increasing the commitment to actualize her 700-year vision of a strong continuing community.
--Junryu
The third year memorial for Taihaku was a time for reflection. After our visit to the cemetery we headed down the hill for a closing, As we began to form a circle around the fire, the ravens began an earnest ruckus reminding us of our interconnectedness and Taihaku's loving continued presence.
--Genkyoku
Although I participated in the ceremony online, the spirit of the day was beautifully conveyed over Zoom. The spirit of love and community that were generated during the various aspects of the ceremony were conveyed warmly to me, especially during the offering of incense and the procession to and from the cemetery. To see so many people show up to pay their respects to Taihaku Roshi was a testament to her ongoing legacy and connection to us all.
--Kinsho
Tiny moments stand
out.
Heather, Susan and I
arrived early to make deviled eggs and those fussy cream cheese sandwiches.
We slipped easily into
warmth and companionship.
I thought of Taihaku
blowing through the kitchen like a strong wind, always on her way to somewhere
else. She would stand tall, pause, and inspect the texture of the cream cheese
and trimming of the crusts. A woman of details, control, and caring.
After the ceremony and
uncrating of the bell, Kenzan’s face was radiant. He handed out the books. His
blue eyes brilliant. His devotion palpable.
--Doshin
I joined the service online. Even at a distance, I felt at one with its deep ceremonial gravitas, individual bows and incense offerings, drumbeats and chanting throughout the solemn procession up to the cemetery, and particularly Taihaku's boundless energy as the Temple Bell first saw the Light of Day in Shao Shan's sacred space. Thank you, Caleb for letting us be there too.
--Honchu
After participating in the memorial ceremony, the following
thoughts came to mind.
The body remembers the smell, taste, and feeling of loss. I sense your heart in the sangha.
--Zenkai
We started with introductions and shared some observations of the natural world, such as the warmer weather, longer days, bright flowers, baby birds leaving their nests, and shimmering quaking aspen leaves. We then explored our animal senses as we smelled the lilacs, peonies and wild paintbrushes; used our deer ears to listen to the cawing ravens; observed subtle differences in blades of grass with our owl eyes; felt the ground beneath our feet with our fox paws; and nibbled on delicious wild strawberries and other snacks with our bunny mouths.
The children then joined the adults in the zendo, where Kenzan brought down the stone held by the Buddha on the altar for each of us to hold while breathing quietly.
